Week 3...

Man I don't know where to begin. Training is going good. I feel good running and I know that my superman is flying with me. Couple of things. Last week I had a tough run on Tuesday, so I get a package in the mail - TWO superman wristbands and a superman T-shirt. I just cried and loved it. I had no idea who it was from. Later that night I did find out it was from one of my best friends - Jaimee. Love ya & thanks for the support. Last week was tough with the fact that it's been four weeks and a month. It's so hard to believe. I have found more pictures of him lately it's wonderful to see him when he was healthy it makes me think that I didn't take enough pictures. SO now I've vowed to take a little more. Poor Raegan my niece was probably sick of me snapping pictures as she played ball the other day, but that's something I don't have of Trey - In action doing the thing he loved. So now that I can't make up for it with him, I'm going to be better with everyone else. So beware when you see me with the camera!
I also got this email from a good friend - I believe that I have to post it, not only has Trey touched so many people in his sickness he's still doing it.
have to tell you what happened to me yesterday. I am training to be in the Race for the Cure in May. Anyhow...I have been thinking a lot about you and your family and it's giving me an extra motivation when things get tough out there.Anyhow, I forgot to charge my Ipod on Sunday, and so when I went to run yesterday I only had 1/2 a battery life (hopefully you have an ipod so you know what I am even talking about) So prior to the last two songs I had left to run, my battery light turned to red---I didn't think it was going to make it thru those songs. But it did, somehow! Stayed red, but still worked. My run was not easy yesterday and I thought a lot about Trey and how you said he was so strong...I pushed myself harder. As a cool down, I have been doing as you, and listening to the song 'Held' I knew I wasn't going to be able to b/c my Ipod was going to crash---so I went to flip to it anyhow...and much to my shock, and cold chills, the bar went back up to 1/2 battery- Green. I cried Mel. I am crying now as I type this. Amazing how someone I never met, can push me and so many others to do better.

It's amazing the people that are pushed in another direction now all because of our superman.
I also want to mention our Ryan - Trey's J5 big brother is having some tough times right now and could use some big prayers. SO pick up those prayers for Ryan and all the other J5 kids and everyone else that has their special requests! We love you!

Trey was definitely with me last night - I really struggled getting in 4 miles, but made it. I know that my superman is flying with me so I have to do this for him. I felt great after I finished and listened to Held and cried and did my cool down. Shawna and Mal are doing good and Wes too. Malery was excited because the UPS Man brought her valentines yesterday that we sent her, I guess he said are you Malery Martens, she smiled and said yes, he said well this delivery is for YOU! She was excited! I feel that right now at this time I feel weak, but have a strength about me that I just cant explain. I don't know. Last night I was in the kitchen, the kids were down stairs, turned around and almost tripped over a little blue soccer ball - it was wierd how it got placed right there - of course I said Trey tried to trip me! I miss him, I'm finding pictures all over the house of him that I haven't seen in awhile. It's a good sign that he's still here with us, just that I can't hear him say "hey aunt Lissa". I also have to comment that we have another follower. Little Noah! Oh how I think of him, how much I cried when he walked up to Trey's casket and just cried at his best friend there - it's so hard to explain to a young one. We love you Noah - Tey tay loved his no no.... (I know I probably didn't do that right but you got the point)
“Children with cancer are like candles in the wind who accept the possibility that they are in danger of being extinguished by a gust of wind from nowhere and yet, they flicker and dance to remain alive, their brilliance challenges the darkness and dazzles those of us who watch their light.”-Author unknown
I got that from Ryans Site - Continue to pray for him and let him keep fighting the good fight for himself and our Trey. Trey loved Ryan so much.

Week 1 down....

Well the weather has cooperated and I was able to run outside. I have felt a great sense of being while running. I have a song on my Ipod and it talks about superman - it's kind of my special song. I feel great - then I run and afterwards my cool down song is always Held By Natalie Grant, which I spoke some of her song at Trey's funeral. I feel a sense of closeness to him that I can just relax and breathe and look into the sky and reflect. I really miss him, I'm sure Shawna and Wes and Mal do too! There are days that go by when I think he's home and fine - but then I just hit myself and come back to reality. Every morning when I'm taking the kids to Nana's house we say our prayers and we say what we think Trey is doing every day in heaven - so the other day with the clouds out they said they didn't think he'd play outside that day - so instead we said he's inside the house of gold playing wii. It's great to be able to think positive thoughts for my kids. It's so hard to realize he's gone. & like so many cancer patients and familys your life is never the same - it's either that fear in the back of your mind that something could be wrong with your child again or that reality that your child or loved one is gone. It's a horrible feeling that is just something you can't describe. I'm sure all of you whose lives that Trey touched feel that loss in your hearts too. We have to stay strong because he was strong! We have to live because he wants us to~ We're laying here watching Extreme Makeover and it makes you realize how precious life is and that all too quickly things can change. I try to live my life differently every day, to be more aware of my surroundings, my children and to be thankful of what I have and have had that made me love so much.
FROG for our superman!

cold outside...

Well today was my first actual 'small' distance day. Man it's cold outside. I sucked it up and ran outside! In between meetings at work and Maris' pre-school I managed to squeeze in 3 miles! I would love to have a treadmill to run in my basement - but right now I just don't have that extra $ to throw out - so I needed the fresh air anyway to reflect on my journey and what it was going to be anyway! Trey would've been out playing in the snow if he was here - so I sucked it up and ran - it was actually beautiful out. Along the past few weeks I've come to realize who your true friends are - who is there for you in the times when you really need them. I know our whole family both Rhymer and Martens are struggling - there isn't a day that goes by that I don't see something that reminds me of Trey. & I'm sure everyone is a lot like that. Shawna was reflecting on a conversation her and Wes had the other night - The guys were over at their house and they were watching an OSU ball game - they won and all the guys started throwing Trey up in the air - HE LOVED THAT! So that's what we need to do - reflect on the good times. So with that being said I've come to notice that friends are friends and Best friends are there - no matter what - they just call to say - hey how are you today - I'm thinking of you! & I appreciate that! So when I first committed to do this run my best friend carrie said - oh no you've got to have a running buddy. She's out of the question because she's expecting twins in a few months - & I thought - no I'll be fine - I've got my superman flying along with me, but I did keep thinking it would be nice to have someone during my long runs and never really thought much more of it- But now I do have that running buddy, along with Trey, my Sister in law - Mandy has committed to run this with me and be my Buddy - she's also a best friend of mine. Lord knows she and I haven't always seen eye to eye (smile Mandy) but I know that she's there for me thru the good and bad times and I appreciate that. It's just like I said at Trey's funeral how much support from the Baltimore family that Shawna and Wes have - it's great to have that support and we love it! I'm excited to keep posting and to keep you all updated on my progress, Mandy's progress, how we're getting along remembering stories of Trey and how we're living on for him. I love him so much and I miss him alot - I miss hearing "hey aunt lissa" when I call there. But I have that in my head and believe it or not I do hear it alot. Keep lifting our family up and keep checking in on us!

Now on another J5 note- Trey has another Tree climbing buddy that joined him in heaven today. Mason Woods passed. We are thinking of his family - Mason used to send Trey e-cards all the time. He has a brother named Trey so they had a little connection! We know what their family is going thru and hope brighter days are coming.